It’s just too bad that abusers are never held Grease Stud Sandy tell me about it Stud retro shirt. But refusing to heal and doing what you can to protect yourself isn’t going to punish them one bit. Oh yeah, victim blaming is “you are what you attract” and “you chose him” as if that justifies abuse. If I could take those phrases out of the language, I would because those phrases are deeply hurtful to abuse victims and disempowering to hear. I think a better phrase is “you attract what your desperation will allow”, but that should only be said to someone who is well on the path to recovery. Timing is everything and trying to make someone see their role when they’ve just come out of the mess is victim-blaming and deeply harmful. Once they’ve come to terms to what the abuser did to them does it make sense to talk about this?
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